Friday, 25 May 2012

STUPID IPHONE CASES, ugly designs and lame visual jokes

Phone cases serve a two functions. they have to protect the electronics from being damage from drops and general clumsiness as well as scratches from  keys, coins and other metal objects from your pocket. I had situations where by I was tucking my phone in mid conversation, and I miss the opening and watched in that dramatic slow motion where my phone would drop to the floor.

Most phone cases in cheap stores don't claim to be drop proof from a height of 1 meter, but the big think ones seem to handle such a task. I think my preference are the leather bound wallet designs because they encase the entire phone screen included which helps.

In cases which the ground is not even or stony floor, I can believe a night mare situation where the screen just looks like it been clawed by wolverine, because of so many scratches.

The second function for some unknown reason is its looks. People are attracted to pretty things, weather its a nice car or a beautiful lady. Take Apple in the beginning when all personnel computers looked like white boxes that was only used for logic, things was dull and boring. Now that Apple started to make things shiny and pretty. Things have gone along way for the computer company in sale figures.
A new way of looking at things have made it nice enough for the designer to come out like insects from a garden stone to sprout out and put novel designs on things.
It reminds me of the stupid tee shirt craze when half amusing slogans or jokes was placed on tee shirts to make the wearer a comedian. I think I drew the line when swear words and phrases with sick sexual undertones began seeping in public places. Instead I would try to print my own and have a nice quadratic equation on my tee-shirt.
Even a simple math proof can look pretty to me or am I alone in this statement?.

Anyway customization seems like the driving force for so many designs these days how we like novel designs because it is different to everyone else's. But like the slogan tee-shirts I have seen some real ugly designs for Iphone cases. Here is my list.

This entire typewrite has a useful function of a old fashion keyboard, shame its bulky and stupid looking when you add a Ipad to it, its mixing old and new in a bad way.

A carbonite steve wosniak indeed having a personalised version of this would just make you more of a star-wars nerd then ever. I am not sure waving this in your ear in places other then a comic con convention would give positive impressions

 OK I can see potentially with the violent and trigger happy police of today, there might be some misunderstanding with this gun shaped phone case. Take this out very slowly with the full knowledge that most people are not gonna have the same sick humour as you.
 A novelty case such as this broken skate board is quite useless unless you are a skater and that you have big pockets to hold the extra plastic that surrounds this unique item.
 Hmmm retro idea same lame joke that your phone might look like a communications device back in the late eighties
 For you alcoholics you can now use your phone as a bottle opener with added potential water damage because the fizzy beer will soak your phone, in the name of showing off...
 Real ugly sick murder horror idea for you who want to celebrate Halloween. And then be inconvenienced for the rest of the year if you choose to carry on with this joke. With a hand popping out your pockets.
 I don't mind this design its just that the face sticks out so far from the phone. And if you was to have this in your pocket you would look ridicules away. Or extremely horny with this unknown erect thing in your pockets.
 I thought it might be a good novel thing but really a reusable drawing pad on the back of your phone. Don't they have a APP for that already.
 Bring a knuckle duster phone case into a knife fight and see where it might take you. I am thinking that you are going to need another phone and some stitches...
Real stupid phone case may act like a phone stand but who want this bulky thing in your pocket. And to pull it out to show off and be the pervert that people think you are.

I think Ill just stick with my leather wallet case though some how I do like those arm band versions for joggers. Only I am no jogger and I thought it might look good as a arm wrist phone. I can this for emails and web page functions, more then as a phone. It kind of looks as if I want to live out my fantasy of having a PIP boy 3000 on my wrist.

But thinking about it , this thing has to be many things a small computer.
A calender, a watch or stopwatch, a news paper or information gatherer. As well as a phone.
Dressing it up like a little dolly is not my thing, if anything else I would like to have a secure device that will protect it from drops and prevent it from being lost. (when I walk away from it in a drunken night out with the boys)
If some one can invent something like that then I'll be interested...

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